Butter

The thing about butter is that it is everywhere. I ordered broccoli the other day and they put butter on it. It was just covered in butter. So many people are out there cooking their family dinner with it and getting their children addicted to it. It clogs your arteries, makes you gain weight, and can cause heart problems. Can you imagine how many butter related deaths are in this country every year? I propose a new law in this country. Since people like butter and will not give it up of their own free will I think we should make them suffer. First off I think it should be illegal to use butter at any restaurant. We can not outlaw it. Even though it is bad for us we can use it to make more money to push my agenda. First off we classify every heart problem and every case of high blood pressure and the fatal demise it can lead to a butter related death. We then begin to ostracize the pigs who eat it. If we can paint people who enjoy this thing that is not good for them as horrible individuals it makes it easier on us to tax them. We then make them pay to run ads and programs that oppose what they are for. What better way to handle the situation than to force someone who believes one way to pay to help the group that slanders them? Then we quadruple the price of butter. Hell why stop there? Let’s price a pound of butter at fifty dollars and that can go to help pin more deaths on the individuals that eat butter and also to pay for hospital bills of other people that eat butter. I am not happy to just avoid butter myself by going places that it is not at and by not using it myself. I want those that eat this swill to suffer also. It is my right and their right for me to be content with them not eating it in my presence. Everywhere I go should be butter free. I shouldn’t have to seek out some place free of butter and they shouldn’t be able to find establishments that allow butter.